How To Deal With The Death Of Your Dog

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Dog graveLosing a beloved pet can be emotionally devastating. Your pet is a part of your family and it’s never easy saying goodbye that last time. If you are someone who has recently lost a canine companion, the editors and staff here at CanineJournal.com offer you our most sincere condolences. We understand the pain you are feeling right now and know that this is not easy to handle. We also feel that sometimes it’s best for people to discuss their pet after losing them as a way to begin to recover. We welcome you to leave memories of your dog in our dedicated Pet Loss Support community topic.

In this article, we will offer some strategies and insights to help you work through the mourning process.

The Grief Process

Everyone deals with grief in different ways. Denial, anger, and guilt are all strong initial reactions that preclude the inevitable sadness that comes when the shock is gone. These reactions are often taken out on those closest to the one experiencing the loss, and act almost as a means of protection for that person until they are able to face the truth. The process, as a whole, may look like the following:

  1. Denial and/or anger
  2. Guilt
  3. Sadness and/or grief
  4. Depression
  5. Acceptance

Dealing With your Grief

While grief is a very individual and personal thing, there comes a time for us all when it’s best to stop feeling the loss and to actively choose to move past it. The right time for you, will not necessarily be the same as someone else; depending on how long it takes you to move through denial and get to acceptance, it could take weeks or it could take years for you to become ready to deal with your grief. When you are ready, however, you don’t have to face it alone.

Facing Death Together

Aside from willing family and/or friends, there are entire communities of people who feel just like you and want to connect. Types of support include:

  • Pet-bereavement counseling
  • Pet-loss support hotlines
  • Online and/or local pet-loss support groups and forums

If sitting down for a one-on-one with an actual counselor, or even getting up the nerve to attend a local support group proves too much at this point in your process, Tufts University Cummings School of Veterinary medicine offers a toll-free, Pet Loss Support Hotline for grieving parties. We have also recently set up a Pet Loss Support in our community that may prove helpful.

Personally Facing death

While outside support is an important tool for coping with your grief, there are some things that a support group can’t do for you… you have to do them for yourself. A few things that you can do on your own to help move past your grief include:

  • Acknowledge your sadness, embrace it, and give yourself permission to feel and express this pain! It’s a vital part of the healing process.
  • Write out your feelings. Whether it’s in a personal journal or an essay on Fido that you submit for publication, writing is extremely cathartic.
  • Volunteer with a local animal shelter. While this may be best left for the later stages of grief, just like helping other people helps you forget your own problems, helping other animals will help you move past your loss.
  • Prepare a memorial for your pet. The act of having a service, saying a few words, and laying your pup to rest will definitely help give you the closure you need.

Dealing with Reality

Beyond your grief lies reality: Whether you’re having to make the tough decision to euthanize your sick or aging pet, or if your pet is already gone and you’re having to deal with the memorial, and burial or cremation arrangements, the reality of these situations can come crashing down on you like a ton of bricks. This can leave you feeling overwhelmed and unsure of where to turn. We’ll walk you through these separate scenarios so you can confidently cope with whatever comes your way throughout the process.

Dog Euthanasia

As your pet ages, or in the event that your otherwise healthy pup should become unexplainably ill or injured beyond recovery, it may be necessary to become emotionally prepared to euthanize your pet. From knowing when it’s time, how to say goodbye and what to expect next, our article on Dog Euthanasia will walk you through this difficult process so you don’t have to do it alone.

Dog Cremation

Whether your dog’s death was of natural causes, or you were forced to make that tough decision yourself to end his or her pain and suffering, once your dog has passed comes the matter of cremation or burial. Our article on dog cremation and burial offers information on the process of dealing with the remains, and options for memorializing your pet after death.

Remembering your Pet

Don’t forget: The best way to honor your pet, your four-legged family member, is to remember the good times you had together and to be grateful that you were given the valuable time you had. Gratefulness goes a long way in the healing process, and helps us remember that, despite the heartache when our sweet ones pass on, that it was worth it… and that one day, it will be worth it again.

Rainbow Bridge Can Comfort One Dealing with the Loss of A Pet

Whether you are dealing with the loss of a pet yourself or helping a loved one manage their pain, the Rainbow Bridge is always a nice story to share your sympathy in a very empathetic and caring way.

Rainbow Bridge Poem

Source: CanineJournal.com

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Video: Rainbow Bridge Song

Sara is a writer for Canine Journal. She adores dogs and recently adopted a rescue pup named Beamer. Whole she may be adjusting to life with another being to care for, she needed no time to adjust to all the extra love.

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Gwen
Hi I lost my baby boy Sam 3 weeks ago. Whilst I knew he had cancer which was not curable, he had been responding well to the chemo but sadly caught an infection and we had to make the decision to let him sleep. He was really peaceful but I am struggling with the immense loss and just miss him so much. I have never felt so sad and just wish he was here.
Kimberly AltAdmin
I’m sorry, Gwen. Please know my thoughts are with you.
julia
My beloved Loki boy, mama loves you until the end of time. Never have I loved someone more. You were and are my world. I am deeply gutted that you were alone in the vet hospital when you died! I will never forgive myself for that. You brought me immense joy, my little boy. You were and are mama’s boy, such a good boy, so beautiful and handsome. I hope and pray that you are smiling and feeling peace in heaven… my little angel, you saved me, and made me a better person. Thank you for spending your life with me. I wanted to give you the best of everything possible. How to live without you?! Life is not life without you.
Kimberly AltAdmin
I am so sorry for your loss, Julia. You are in my thoughts.
julia
Thank you… but I can’t forgive myself for putting my little Loki boy through such agony, only for him to die in the hospital without me by his side!! His vet said he had gallbladder mucocele and needed a major surgery. He said the success rate is 85%. Loki made it through the surgery, but after 3 days, he got worse and died. His last 4-5 days were sheer hell for him, the poor angel! I can’t forgive myself, it’s debilitating.
Cheri
I gave my 17 year old dog a supplement that caused her to stop eating and drinking. She was given subcutaneous fluid by a vet but needed to be on IV. She finally went to the hospital, was on IV, but was still not drinking on her own when they let her out. I had to give her water by syringe… they should not have released her from the hospital. I don’t think she was getting enough water from the syringe and within 48 hours she collapsed. I took her to the closest vet (I was out of town so didn’t know any of the vets) and he said he didn’t think she would make it through the night and convinced me to put her down. I later looked at her blood test from that day. Her blood test showed dehydration and elevated kidney values. Her creative was 3.5 and bun 66. I found out bun and creatine can be temporarily elevated due to dehydration. My dog could have been treated and could have survived. How can I ever forgive myself for what happened ? My dog wasn’t acting right… she was pacing etc…overnight and into the next day but I waited for the vet appointment. I feel I let her down. If I would have taken her back to the hospital she would still be alive. Though she was old, she was extremely healthy for a 17 year old dog. She was a mini poodle… they can live into their 20s. I am really suffering feeling like I killed her.
Kimberly AltAdmin
Cheri, I’m so sorry for your loss. Perhaps there was more to your pet’s condition than you were aware of which led the vet to believe she wouldn’t make it through the night. You made the best decision for your dog with the information you were given at the time. You did not kill her. You made an extremely tough call and chose to end her suffering. If I were faced with a similar situation, I’d have done the same thing you did. Try to focus on all the wonderful memories you had during those 17 years with her instead of those final moments. I know that can be difficult to do, but it can save you from the guilt you may be feeling. I’m sure she knew how much you loved her and that you were doing what was best for her. This is not your fault. Please know my thoughts are with you.
Cheri
Thank you. I am trying everything to get past it…therapy, books, forums… but the regret doesn’t go away.

My sister knows the vet that put her down. She told him how distressed I am and that I feel my dog could have been treated and survived based on the blood test. That day was the only time my dogs kidney values were high. The vet said to my sister… “The only other possibility is the hospital released her too soon “. That’s exactly what happened. So that tells me he made the wrong call.

Not sure what to do with that. He would not have had the opportunity to make the wrong call and euthanize her if I would have taken her back to the hospital the night before, when she started pacing or even in the morning. Instead I waited until a 4 pm appointment.

I really don’t know how to help myself. Thanks again for responding.

Kimberly AltAdmin
Oh Cheri, I’m so sorry. Perhaps it would help if you spoke with the vet or someone from the hospital and expressed your feelings? I know that may be difficult to do, so I completely understand and respect if you choose not to. It could bring awareness to them that they are responsible for the care of pets who enter their facilities. Sometimes with work, we get stuck in our ways and perhaps they need a reminder that each dog is important and deserves the best care possible. Perhaps they will still say they thought they were doing the right thing, but it’s still good to voice your concerns in case this can be prevented in the future. Again, I am so sorry you are going through this and you lost your sweet girl. Please remember that you did what you thought was best for her with the information you were given. You looked to professionals for guidance and didn’t want her suffering to continue. None of this is your fault. My thoughts are with you and I hope you find peace soon.
Cheri
Thank you Kimberly. There are so many things I did wrong. I should have checked with my vet before giving her the supplement. She should have gotten vet care sooner when she stopped eating and drinking. She got sub q for days ( instead of IV) which was not the right treatment for high blood sodium. Once she did get IV, she was released too soon… and I should have taken her back immediately when she started pacing and acting strange. She was clearly in distress. I waited too long… waited for an afternoon vet appointment instead of taking her back to the hospital… only to make things worse by putting her down (at the advice of that vet) only to realize she could have been saved. There were so many mistakes on my part and theirs. I did write a letter to the vet and the hospital, trying to focus on the facts, and encouraging them to improve their care to others like me. Even so, How can I forgive myself ? I feel if my actions were different she would still be here. Although she was old she was incredibly healthy until this happened.

She was the love of my life. I’ve never loved anyone or anything as much as I loved her.

julia
Cheri, remind yourself that you did the best you knew how to do… your beloved dog lived a good long life thanks to you. That said, I DO know how you are feeling. Guilt is a debilitating part of grieving our little angels. We are struggling and in great pain, as well. Loki was admitted to the hospital because he stopped eating one day, then he stopped walking. Vet convinced me he needed gall bladder removal surgery : an enormous ordeal for my dog. He didn’t make it! He died in the hospital, and I will never forgive myself!
julia
Cheri, I know how you feel! I feel the same as you right now… We were at the mercy of our veterinarians! They knew best, right? I don’t know how to cope, either. The guilt is killing me.
Cheti
Julia… I am so sorry you are going through this too. In my case the vets made mistakes, but I made a lot of mistakes too. I think this is the hardest, most painful thing I’ve ever experienced. I have been going to therapy, and time has helped a little bit, but the pain and regret is deep. I will be thinking of you. If I find anything that helps me, other than time, I will share my thoughts with you
Deepak Sridhar
I adopted a mixed breed, Simple, 6 years ago after taking care of her while she was outside for 3 years prior to that. She was my life, and so much more. She meant everything to me, and was my single biggest source of happiness, joy and comfort. She passed away on July 31 due to lung cancer. She went for her walk right till her last hour and made the effort to wag her tail and keep me happy right till the last minute. It is heartbreaking, too painful to accept, too hard to digest and sometimes I just wish it was a bad dream and I still look at the door hoping she’ll open it with her paws and come in any minute. She was unlike any other, and kept the house so clean though she was never trained. She knew when to stop eating and never once did she beg for food.

The only comfort I am deriving is that she has moved on to a better, peaceful, happier, healthier life, one with God. I am unable to accept that she is physically no longer a part of her previous / my current life! Waiting for the day I will reunite with her at the Rainbow Bridge.

Kimberly AltAdmin
I’m so sorry for your loss, Deepak. My thoughts are with you.
julia
I feel your pain 100%, Deepak. I could have written the same thing. I am struggling with unbearable heartbreak. My baby boy was my world, my reason for living. I am inconsolable. He wasn’t supposed to go yet. He got sick and died within 5 days. It has been 5 days since he died and I am gutted with grief. You are not alone in your immense grief.
Deepak Sridhar
I am so sorry for you loss, Julia. No amount of pain can match losing one’s dog.. The happiness they spread, the love they shower knows no limits and that is what makes it so much tougher. The only solace is.. They are now in His arms, in a much better place (no one would disagree that dogs are too pure for life here).. I fully empathise with you and may God give you and I the strength to recover and cope and somehow move on with life, until our turn comes to reunite with Loki & Simple respectively 🙂
Sharri Dorsey
My fiance and I had a beautiful chorkie named Leo. We had the pleasure of having him in our lifes for a year and a half. He passed away last night after being attacked by a bigger dog. The pain is unbearable, so many emotions. With the little time we had we him he touched our lives in the most amazing way, the entire family. We loved him with everything we had and he will be truly missed.
One day at a time ..
Kimberly AltAdmin
I am so sorry for your loss, Sharri. You are in my thoughts.
Jennifer
I just went through this Tuesday. Our 1 year old 100 lb dog killed my 10 year old pug Borris in front of me. I tried to stop her but I couldn’t save him. I was bit also because I was trying to pull on her jaw. Borris is my best friend we were inseparable. I can’t eat or sleep and not sure how to function without our routine. Bed time is the hardest. He is who I loved the most. It’s so hard
Brady Hull
We had to put our Bo down 9 days ago. I am still suffering from this loss. Bo was a boxer/ridgeback mix and lived a beautiful 14 1/2 years. She always was waiting by our back door when we would come home from being out and about. She followed us wherever we went the last year always wanting to make sure we were close by. I feel heartbroken, so lonely that she is no longer with us. She still had all her wits about her, loved her walks and treats mostly just loved us. I feel very guilty that we put her down too early. She was falling quite a bit with her hind legs giving out on her. She would get back up, but it did appear it was getting more difficult. We were told we could get a hip harness and rubber grips placed on her toes to help walk on hard surfaces, but just not sure that is the way our pets should live. We were also traveling last weekend and the next 2 weekends as well, and could not stand the thought of her falling, being scared and lonely at what is a very nice place that we take her when we are out of town. I believe she could have gone a while longer hence the guilt. I just hope we did the right thing.
I miss my best friend very much.
Kimberly AltAdmin
I’m so sorry, Brady. I’m sure your vet wouldn’t have euthanized Bo if they thought it was premature. Try not to feel guilty about saying goodbye to Bo in order to keep her from suffering. This was a selfless act and one that I’m sure was not easy to do. I hope you were able to spoil and love on her a little before saying goodbye. I’m sure she knew how loved she was and she’d want you to know the same thing. Please know my thoughts are with you.
Reese Davis
I just lost my dog Capone today and I just feel like I can’t do on anymore to think il never be able to hold his paw again….I just can’t do it
Kimberly AltAdmin
Reese, I’m so sorry. I know this time is extremely difficult, but do not think it is impossible to go on. We all have our own experiences with how we deal with grief. I do not want to say anything to upset you, but please know the pain you feel is totally normal and acceptable. Unfortunately, you will discover a new normal, one that doesn’t include Capone. This may not be easy, but you will learn how to handle it. You are strong, you can do this. Allow yourself to feel this loss and feel whatever emotion comes to you. Call a close family member, friend or a professional if you have any thoughts about harming yourself. We all want you to be able to grieve your loss in a safe manner. Please know our thoughts are with you.
Irene
How are you now? I lost mine ok the 29th and to be honest life is not good x
julia
I know exactly how you feel.
Kristy Sheffield
I lost my Max today he was a Jack Russell.Max 2001-2018. He was 17 years old. We have grown up together. I have had him by my side almost half my life. I am so heart broken. He was one of my best friends. He never let me down. I will truely miss him so bad. I rescued him from a vets office just as someone surrendered him. We had an instant bond. I know life will be hard not having him in it. But, I wouldn’t want him to stand here on Earth one more day in the shape he was in. He was only breathing not living the Max life. Which hurt me to see. I just couldn’t put him down. He was still eating and going to the bathroom. So who was I to play God. He is the only one who knows when it’s time for Max to go to that bridge. I had a special me and Max moment a couple of days before he passed. I am thankful for that! He truely was the best furbaby I could have ever had! I love you Max and will think of you often and miss you unbearably. Love your Mom, Kristy
Kimberly AltAdmin
I am so sorry for your loss, Kristy. Max sounds like the best dog you could ask for. Please know my thoughts are with you.
Sohal
July 18th 2018 – Cezu – our Golden Lab went to the Rainbow bridge. Cezu was on this earth for 13 years and 10 months. Cezu – You are the best boy we will ever know. We will miss you forever and ever. Thank you for bringing so much joy to our lives and giving us so many great memories. We will never ever ever forget you and you will be in our hearts always. We know you are in doggie heaven now enjoying your treats, pampering and new friends. We am sure your also checking out all the ladies. 🙂 We hope in your next life you return to us so we can continue to love you forever my darling. Cezu we have shared your story so it is there forever – #MissYouCezu ❤️❤️
Lily
July 15th at 1:00pm. I held my beloved boscoe for the last time. He was a staffie with ears that were straight up uncut. He had a beautiful tan and white coat and a cute purplish red nose. One ear crooked from cauliflower. He has been my companion for 9 years, on this earth for 10. He was battling with a sickness that no vet could provide answers for, I still don’t know what happened. He was my baby, and my best friend. I spent every penny I had to try and save him. And for a few days, he was himself again. I loved watching him smile again, but then he just collapsed and began shutting down. I made the decision to end the pain as soon as I could. I came home and talked with my dad, we talked about all our memories. How every day, boscoe would walk beside me and sit next to me on the porch. I remembered how he would watch me from wherever he was resting. When i cooked, he made sure to get the floor nice and clean for me. He had a ducky that he carried with him everywhere he went. He smiled at you with such genuine emotion. He always told me when he needed anything. He was the smartest, gentlest, sweetest dog I have ever met. We laughed at how he would barrel through any obstacle in his way. I’ll never forget how he would come pester me when I wasn’t feeling mentally well, or he would sleep close to me when i was ill. Every person who met him instantly fell in love. We were seperated for a few years and when I got him back I swore I would never let him go. He had been mentally gone for hours, but as the vet administered the medicine, he came back for a moment and looked into my eyes, and he did his signature wink. And then he was gone. The pain I feel now, is worth knowing that Boscoe isn’t in pain anymore. He lived 10 long spoiled years. Fluffed pillows, warm fresh food, expensive kibble, tons of furry friends, the biggest christmases any dog has ever gotten. I spoiled him rotten, and I was blessed for every moment he spent at my side, watching my every move. It’s quiet without his snore, but I know he’s waking someone else up with his snorts on the other side. I miss him.
Kimberly AltAdmin
I am so sorry for your loss, Lily. It sounds like Boscoe had the best life possible for a dog. He was so lucky to live life with you. I bet he adored you endlessly and loved his fluffy pillows, elaborate Christmases and yummy food. My heart breaks for you and please know that my thoughts are with you.
Kaitlin
July 11th marks the day that we lost our precious shih tzu, Bailey. My heart hurts writing these words today and my eyes are sore from the tears. He was the funniest, smartest, and sweetest little man a girl could ask for. My best friend. He was with us for 12 beautiful years before finally slipping away in his sleep. I only wish I could have been there to say goodbye before he passed. Surprise deaths are shocking, to say the least.

Today was an especially cloudy and gloomy day. However at one point the clouds broke for just a moment to allow the suns rays to spill down to earth. I happened to look up just at this moment, and I couldn’t help but think it was my little Bailey smiling down on me. The love my boy had for myself and our family was too great to die with him, and I truly believe he taught me to be a better and more caring woman. I’ll forever miss the click clack of his tiny nails on the hardwood floor, or the sound of his gentle “piggy snort”. He touched many lives in the span of his short time here on earth and has left many with a puppy sized hole in their hearts. Moving on will not come easy, nor quickly, but I do my best to remember the joy rather than the pain. He will be missed until the end of time. I love you, handsome boy!

Kimberly AltAdmin
Kaitlin, I am so sorry for your loss. Dogs have a way of impacting our lives greatly. It’s such a shame that their lifespans aren’t longer. When I read comments like yours it reminds me to enjoy every relationship I have in my life because we only have each other for a short period of time. Please know my thoughts are with you.
Garry Giles
My heart breaks for you. Buster, my Lakeland terrier is 19 this year. He has not been in the best of health recently. I’m beginning to think I’m keeping him going for my benefit. But he enjoys his food and very short walks. And he loves traveling in the car.
I can’t imagine life without him. Sadly he will go soon. I will rescue another when he is gone. The same as I rescued him. Buster rescued me too. For that Ian grateful.
Ramiro
Tzar was my unique puppy and his nick name was “poticos”. Today at 5 am my four-legged baby succumbed to myeloid leukemia. A very aggressive and rare form of cancer in dogs. He was only 2 ½ years old German Shepperd. Tzar, a dog that loved everyone, was the type of dog that will bring you your coat when he had to go out in the winter and he will bring you your shoes when he had to go out in the summer. He loved tennis balls and he will always find a way to make you play with him. If he went outside he would bring his ball to play catch. If he was inside, he would throw his ball from the stairs so that you can throw it back at him. Every day after coming back from work he greeted us with such happiness that made you forget how hard your day was. He would give you his paw if you showed him your hand. He was the touch of sugar that completed your day – what a treat! Friends brought their little dogs and Tzar played with them. He will let them bite him and if it hurt, he just pushed them gently with his big paws. If kids visited us, he just melted of happiness. He played with them, he would take their punishment and he would celebrate their joy. That was puppy Tzar. He slept anywhere in the house, but every morning when we woke up, he would be sleeping on the carpet right next to our bed. He rolled on his back, so you can pat him, and he looked at you with one of his big eyes and give you a “kiss” of his own. He never was in a bad mood – he just loved you for free asking nothing in return.
Every morning while getting ready to go to work and putting my socks he would steal one sock from the pair and made him chase him. That was a routine every morning. I wish now I would have more time with him to do just that. I regret wasting my time watching tv when I could have been playing with him. I regret not finding more time to go walking with him. I regret a lot of things, but I mostly regret not realizing what he meant while he was alive.

I am so so sad Tzar is not here anymore. The pain is overwhelming. The house feels empty and my wife and I certainly don’t know where to go to avoid the pain. But it is through this pain that I realize now what he meant. I realized the gift we were given. Through this I learnt that there is nothing more important than spending time with your love ones. That every moment you get to share with the ones you love is a gift. I learnt that every second of our lives we waste suffering and arguing and being angry is time that we have just wasted. Nothing last forever and it is important to realize that the way we carry our lives has a big impact in the order of life. Instead of hating, love. Instead of getting angry, forgive. Instead of frowning, smile. I am sure those actions will make someone happy and that has a lot of worth in our lives and in the lives of others. I learnt that from my dog. Tzar showed us unconditional love and all the time he devoted to us was a space of pure and transparent joy. Although I don’t have my baby boy next to me anymore, the unique experience I was allowed to live through Tzar will have a big impact of the king of man I aim to be every day. I did learn something from him! Tzar was my unique boy.

Thank you Tzar for what you brought to our lives. Thank you for being who you were – loving us every moment of your live. We love you so so much and we will always love you poticos.

Laura and Ramiro

Kimberly AltAdmin
Laura and Ramiro, I am so sorry for your loss. Your story of Tzar brings tears to my eyes. Immediately after reading it I snuggled my dog because your words spoke so much truth to me. Our dogs are nothing but happy 24/7 and they deserve all the love we give them. It sounds like the two of you were absolutely wonderful companions for Tzar. I’m so sorry he only had a short time with you but it sounds like he impacted your lives greatly. Thank you for sharing your story with us and opening up. My thoughts are with you all.
Ramiro
Thank you Kimberly for your heart-felt words!
Renee
Hello! I wanted tell everyone about my beautiful Doberman named Uma. Uma came into my life at a time of tremendous sadness after my two beautiful Boston Terriers had to be put to sleep at the age of 12 from mast cell tumors. Uma my companion and baby girl helped me with the loss of them. She was everything you’d want in a Doberman protective loving and just all around happy comical and my baby girl. We adopted a blind male Doberman so she’d have a brother. He followed her around because she was his eyes. One day 11 year old Uma started having bloody noses. The vet treated her as if she has a sinus infection and it never cleared up. She then had a CT scan that determined she had two sinus cancer masses
In the frontal lobe near her brain. We discussed with the vet about radiation but she was so sick we didn’t think she’d survive. She got weaker and wobbly. She was taking round the clock painkillers and meds for swelling and antibiotics for diarrhea. The tumors were causing her right eye to protrude forward and her skull to become misshapen. Then for whatever reason some of the swelling subsided and we had some of Uma back for about two and 1/2 weeks. Day before July 4th she woke up and the swelling has come back aggressively. Both her eyes involved this time and the
Bridge of her nose. She couldn’t eat or drink from the pain. We called the vet and scheduled the appt to end her suffering. I was weak in my knees and tears streaming down my face. The vet and staff all kissed her and hugged me. We put her on her blanket and I sang How Much Is That Doggie In The Window to her over and over while a stroked her face and she slipped away. I sang that song to her many many times even since she was a pup. My Uma left this world and I wished I could’ve gone with her. I’m shaking and carrying writing this. Does she look for me wherever she is? I’m not eating or sleeping much. My male dog Pax that is blind is lost without his Uma. How can I go on? I’m getting so sick. I’m so so distraught.

Uma was the best best baby girl anyone could have. I was the lucky one to have had the opportunity to have her be my baby. Me and Pax are so so lost. I don’t know if me pax or my husband’s lives will ever be the same.

Thank you to all the posters on here it helps me know there are other people to relate to.

Kimberly AltAdmin
Oh Renee, I cannot express how sorry I am. Uma sounds like the absolute perfect companion. I’m so sorry she had to endure this pain but I’m so glad you were able to help her pass comfortably. I can’t imagine the loss you and Pax are feeling. I’m sure wherever Uma is, she is missing you both dearly and looks forward to reuniting with you again. Thank you for sharing your story with us and please know you and Pax are in my thoughts.
Teagan
My dog Jodie was only 5 years old when she passed. She had been suffering from a kidney infection since last year but she struggled through it until a while ago when she stopped eating her food, but she drank water so my family just assumed it was the heat. She didn’t move as much and hid in corners, so i had to carry her to her food and water bowls or to her bed. She had stayed in my room the last two nights before she passed, when usually she would stay in my mother’s room with our two other dogs. I was going down to get her to take her to my room for bedtime when i realised she had passed on. Sweet little baby had the most peaceful passing i could hope for, but i still can’t get over how she’s missing from my life now.
Kimberly AltAdmin
I am so sorry for your loss Teagan.
DeborahK
I lost my Maddie last Wednesday. I’m numb still. She had been I’ll for 6 month, we almost lost her in December. She was diagnosed with sm intestinal disease. Liver, gallbladder and cancer. We decided to treat her 2ith Palative care. We did everything possible. She was my purpose, we had lost our Emma 7 months ago, a deadly blood disease came in and she was gone in days. Our Maddie was devastated we were too.Maddie stopped eating, lost 16 pounds but tests showed normal, then ultra sound showed the disease. She just turned 13, beautiful girl. I spent my days for all that time and left on a trip to have a family reunion that was planned. My inter voice said no I was only there two days and she went down hill.my guilt is awful, my husband was at work, I was three thousand miles away and she passed away by herself, how can I forgive myself. I had been by her side for months, had her checked before I left, and a perfect storm came. I’ve returned home and everything is where I left it except my sweet baby. Empty quiet home no closure.
Kimberly AltAdmin
Oh Deborah, I’m so very sorry for your losses. I know you are feeling guilty for leaving for your family reunion, but perhaps that’s what Maddie wanted. Perhaps she wanted to be strong for you and your husband and wanted to pass away on her own. I know this is something we cannot know, but try not to be too hard on yourself. I bet Maddie knew how loved she was and would want you to know how much she cared for you as well. I realize I don’t know you and I didn’t know your sweet dogs either, but I believe our dogs have a wonderful way of understanding us in a way that we as humans can’t even express. Please know that my thoughts are with you.
Monica Chavez
You make a great point that a pet is a part of your family and it’s never easy saying goodbye for the last time. My sister recently lost her dog when he got hit by a car, and it’s been really hard for her. It would be nice if she could have a nice memorial service for him so that she can feel like she got some good closure.
Kathy
We lost our sweet Dog, Chloe, on Friday. She was 15 1/2 years old, a terrier mix. Last year, her kidney value was a little high at 2 (the high of the range was 1.4). They vet told me that she had kidney disease and could not tell me how long I would have her as its progression varied. She started to worry me the week of June 4th because she would sniff her food and then wouldn’t eat it so we would mix it with a little ground turkey. She had been doing this before then, but it seemed more so that week. I had to go out of town on June 9th, but my husband took care of her. She was laying around more and not wanting to get up as much. I researched online and thought she was just getting old because there were so many comments about this subject. However, I finally made an appointment with the vet because she lost interest in getting up to go for short walks and no longer wanted to eat. When we took her in and they tested her, her kidney value was over 13. We were told her kidneys weren’t just failing, they had failed and there was really nothing they could do. I am feeling so sad and so guilty that I should have known that something was going so very wrong. She had over the past year been very picky about eating and not wanting to eat her dog food which I discussed with the vet and she told us that was okay. I have a video of her playing with our other dog on May 28th of this year which was not that long ago and she was okay. It is so hard for me because I feel like I should have taken her to the vet sooner and maybe she would have been okay and recovered. I don’t know how to deal with the guilt or pain I am feeling each day. I know she lived a long life at 15 1/2, but I just feel like I should have and could have done more to help her live longer. So very sad.
Summer Adair
You only feel that way because you love her – don’t – step back and know you would’ve done anything- I lost my dog Friday June 22nd – my story is different but the guilt is the same – just hold on and just love her even though she’s not here now ❤️
Kathy
Thank you so much for your kind reply.
Mike
My Velvet passed in a similar way. I got her from the Humane Society, so I’m not sure of her true age, but she was a sassy little old lady that loved pets and cuddles. She had always been slow to get around and was a picky eater, only preferring special treats like ground beef and pork roast. A couple weeks before she passed, she started eating less and vomited once or twice. This was something that happened before. Then when she vomited again and had a racing heart rate, I took her into emergency. Her creatinine was 16 and her BUN was off the chart. She also had pretty severe spinal degeneration that was starting to affect her front legs. We always thought it was hip arthritis since she’s mostly German Shepard. She was started on IV fluids at the neighborhood vet, but it just wasn’t enough. She passed in the night. I still remember her looking back at me when they took her back for the last time. I wish I could have been there when she passed. I wonder what else I could have done for her. Maybe if I was home more or was more vigilant, she would have had a chance. I am so grateful for the time we had together and the love we shared, but in the end, I miss her. She was my special little lady.
Kathy
I appreciate so much that you took the time to share your story about Velvet.
Asha
My beautiful baby Milo was taken away for me. He was attacked by an Big aggressive pitbull and Milo was a small maltipoo, no bigger than 4 pounds. He was so loving, sweet, and full of life. He did not deserve to die that way. I tried my hardest to save him but nothing was working. By the time he released my Baby it was too late. I have a feeling Milo knew it was his time because the night before he was the most loving, couldn’t stop Snuggling or kissing me. So I feel like that was his way of saying goodbye but I can’t help but blame myself for not carrying him in my arms or taking him out at another time. I feel So numb, lost, and angry. The owner of the aggressive dog gets to walk away with no repercussions and I have to suffer the loss of my Milo. This is the most traumatic experience I have ever endured. I just hope Milo knows I’m So sorry, I tried my hardest to save him, and I loved him So much. I know grief is something we will all experience but I wouldn’t wish this pain on my worst enemy. Especially with witnessing such a violent act.
Kimberly AltAdmin
I am so sorry for your loss, Asha. I can’t imagine witnessing something as gruesome as you did. I’m sure Milo knew how much you loved him through your daily interactions. Please know that my thoughts are with you.
Ellie
I lost my baby girl Riely last night. She was my heart and soul. I can’t stop crying. My house is so empty without her. I feel someone ripped my heart. I have another dog and seeing him sad make me even sadder. I love my dogs and I can’t imagine my life without them. I don’t know how to deal with the pain.
Kimberly AltAdmin
I’m so sorry, Ellie. Don’t hesitate to reach out to family or friends for support during this time. A grief counselor is also perfectly acceptable to contact. Please know you are in my thoughts.
Summer Adair
Sorry Ellie – my heart is with you
Aaron
My beloved dog Lola passed away 2 weeks ago. I was eating my breakfast getting ready for school when like always she came in to lie down beside me, except she never got back up. I didn’t even realise she was gone until my dad told me. I loved my dog very much, I suffer from depression and she was always there to keep me from tipping over the edge. I have been in denial since she died and just can’t come to terms with her death. I have two other young dogs (both hers) which helps with dealing with the loss but I just can’t accept it. I found it very hard to write this as she was with me since I was 1 so there isn’t a part of life where She wasn’t there, I do feel that this has helped. Thanks you and thanks Lola for helping me through the hard times
Kimberly AltAdmin
I’m so sorry for your loss, Aaron. I’m glad writing this helped a little bit. Please know my thoughts are with you and don’t hesitate to seek out help or talk to your family/friends about what you’re feeling. You don’t need to go through this alone.
Barbara moore
Yesterday my 10 year old dog Sassy was having surgery on her leg for a growth. I didn’t understand the situation with anesthesia. 3 hours ago she past away. The emotions I am feeling is unbearable. Can’t stop crying. I feel responsible for her death. I miss her everything in the house says Sassy. I wish there was a miracle. How can I deal with this? Every time I have had to deal with this it goes on for months and even years. I thought about another puppy, then it makes feel guilty. This shouldn’t have happened. She was still healthy. This 100 pound dog was the greatest. I am having her cremated couldn’t stand to dig another grave. I hug her and could hardly let go.i need help. This is consuming me
Kimberly AltAdmin
I am so sorry for your loss, Barbara. Have you considered seeing a professional to help you grieve the loss? My thoughts are with you.
Sam Alpert
My dog dexter was a great dog. He was a Great Pyrenees and lived until he was 11. He was so gentle, caring, and such a nice companion. I can’t remember a day without him in my life. I don’t know how to cope with him being put down. Any advice to help me with this is greatly apprciated. Thanks
Kimberly AltAdmin
I’m sorry for your loss, Sam. Everyone grieves and copes differently, so it’s hard to give advice. For some, it may be helpful to know that others have gone through similar situations, so reading the comments in this article may be beneficial. For others, that may cause more anxiety and hurt them further.

From my experience, this is what has helped me in the past when I’m grieving.
1) Allow yourself to remember the fond memories you have with Dexter but also allow yourself to shut them out if thinking about him is too hard.
2) Give yourself 5 minutes everyday to cry as hard as you want. I suggest doing this in the morning to help keep those emotions from bottling up. Crying helps release tension and it can feel good to let it out.
3) Speak to others in your life or within this comment thread. Don’t feel like you have to keep to yourself. It’s okay to lean on others for support.

I hope this helps and please know you are in my thoughts.

Amanda
Can you tell me how you guys deal with the loss of your dog (family member)?? It’s only been a day and it’s so hard already. It feels weird without him. His name is Oliver. He was super protective over me and was always by my side now it’s just… does time heal? I watched him as he was born and was with him when he died. I know I will never get over it but my heart hurts so much. I miss my sweet boy…
Kimberly AltAdmin
I’m so sorry, Amanda. The best advice I can give you is to stay busy, try to remember the good memories and allow yourself to cry when those moments hit you. From personal experience, time doesn’t necessarily heal the loss of a loved one. It’s more of you learn how to continue on without that person or pet. You learn a new normal even though it isn’t the normal you wanted. There will be times where you wish Oliver was still with you. Times where you wish you could go for one last walk or throw the frisbee one last time. Allow your heart to hurt and lean on those around you for support. Please know that my thoughts are with you.
Dorian
My dog, black buetifull black Labrador, Max. We had to end his life yesturday. He was only 10,5 years old but he was hit with a terrible desease – cancer that hit his nose. His sweet, sweet little nose. We were struggeling with this since last January, at the beggining everything was ok, he started to have pink stains on his nose. The real horror began around march this year. His nose started to just fall off, pice by pice, we were going to vet that gave us strong painkillers but it was all we could do, this cancer was uncureable… The real “end” was around May, we were just strugeling to tell ourseves that its time, He had no nose now, his face was swallen from cancer, on his nose there started to “open” forcibly holes to let pus to come out. We could only watch, kiss him, clean him, feed him by hand, he was so thin… he dropped 10kg down. He coudnt breathe, he was all swallen with a pus comming from every hole around his buetifull face…

Yesturday was his “good day”, he trusted me… and I took him to the vet, he didnt even …. he just went in… I feel like I betrayed him. I know that it had to be done but I cant forgive myself to do it. The brain tells you that did good but the hearth yells. We creamated him same day… I have his ashes next to me and I cant stop crying. He was my first doggy boy. I dont even know what to do with the ashes, we have no pets cementary here, I cant bury it becouse I dont have a place for it….

Now in the house I cant do anything, I am just crying. I am doing some little things that I used to do for him: open the door gentlly cause he liked to sleep there, turn around when I’m out to look for him, I even gave him some fresh water when I waked up today… When those moments come and you realize what you are doing… it hurts so much.

I am so sorry to write all this here, its just that I have no one to talk about it… When I saw this youtube song now I just cried so much, even still I can’t stop.

I even created his “memory video” today. I dont know what can I do more, I am not dealing with this, I loved him so much and now he is just… not here…

Please hug your dogs really really strongly when you still can. Love with you all dog-lovers.

Dorian

I’m sorry for grammar mistakes, english is no my national languange and rght now I just cant think clearly.

Kimberly AltAdmin
I am so sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts.
Kathy
I am so sorry about your dog, Max. Know that you are not alone. It sounds like you and Max had a very special bond. Your dog was so lucky to have you and I am sure he felt the love you had for him. I too am experiencing so much sadness from the loss of my dog as well so I understand how you must be feeling. I hope that you are getting better each day.
Yissel
I just lost my best friend Tyson, he was a 13 year old Pitbull my family first got him when I was 6 I’m 18 now, he was a puppy so he grew up with me basically . About a year ago he got Laryngeal Paralysis and he had trouble breathing but today it was really bad, we knew he was going to pass soon but, it still hurts and they way he died was very sad. I was in the shower as all this was happening but I came out as soon as I could, my parents were going to take him to the emergency room but he couldn’t make it down the porch and just died there, we probably could have prevented this but my family couldn’t make $5,000 appear out of thin air. I’m just very sad, today’s was supposed to be a good day, E3 was today where they announced new video game titles. But we will get his ashes and a paw print.
We have another dog here at home her name is Roxy she’s 14 and doesn’t have any health problems she’s fine, I got her when I was 5. She’s doing good but I hope she doesn’t get super depressed. Thanks for anyone that read this, he was such a sweet dog, nice to anyone he met. I will always love you Tyson. Have fun where ever you are, you deserve all the happiness in the world.
Kimberly AltAdmin
I’m so sorry for your loss, Yissel. Thank you for sharing your story with us and please know that my thoughts are with you.